computer fraud

The conversation went something like this:

<Phone Rings>

“Oh, hello. Can I speak to Mr Seamans please?”
“Speaking. Can I ask who is calling?”
“Oh yes…I am calling from Blippity Bloopity software company, and I am calling you as we have received notification that your computer is faulty.”
“Really? What’s wrong with it then?”

“Your computer has been infected with software programs which are causing it to slow down until it may stop working.”
“Wow! I did think it was going a bit more slowly this morning… I’m so glad you’ve told me this.”
“Yes, Mr Seamans. And also your financial data is at risk by these same programs which are accessing them.”
“Good grief! Thanks ever so much for telling me all this! I’m really grateful to you for ringing.”
“Okay, Mr Seamans, now what we can…”
“Just a minute. Can you tell me exactly what these are please?”
Silent pause.
“Mr Seamans, we can now…”
“No hang on. Can you tell me what these programs are actually called?”
“What… they… are… called?”
“Yes. As in ‘Windows.exe’ that sort of thing…”


<Noise on phone>

Such a shame…I was just beginning to enjoy it! :-/

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